Friday, March 15, 2013

FOLLOW or FALL LOW

Have you ever had a recurring dream, continual thought or just could not seem to get a song out of your head ?... Good I am not the only one , with that being said .. a specific word has been etched on my heart for some time now and it is the word  (FOLLOW ).

The word follow is described this way via the dictionary :   To go after someone .

We as human beings follow other human beings, our emotions, desires, thoughts and convictions. The Old Testament scriptures " to follow"  is taken in part from the word ahar which means  behind or after, Describing how a believer demonstrates faith by "walking after" the One they profess to be Lord. In the New Testament we see " to follow " is from the Greek akoloutheo which speaks of the person who chooses to follow Christ. Through our daily choices, declarations, actions, responses or the lack thereof , we too are making a choice as to whether we want to follow Christ.


We follow people on Twitter, but where are they leading us ????, now there is nothing wrong with wanting to keep up with a celebrity, public figure, friend or athlete. But if I am in close communion with you , I should not have to search the internet to find out what is happening in your life . 


We follow trends, if the world or a stylist says something is hot, fashionable or to die for , do we rush out and consider it a must have ?.  We have witnessed the death and destruction of people who followed false gods and lost their lives due to a leader of a cult. Some were convinced to offer up their children as sacrifices, their own bodies...  were deceived into going without food or water in order to reach a place of nirvana, encouraged to drink concocted beverages and some have even given all of their life savings to fund a cause that lead them straight to hell. 


 When we go to the doctor, we are examined and if need be medication is prescribed and we are then told to finish the medication and come back for a follow up appointment. The physician wants to make sure that you have followed his instruction and are doing what needs to be done to keep you healthy. Then we have what we call a follow through and this is where we make the necessary changes , adjustments and apply knowledge to complete a task. There are songs entitled " Follow the Leader" and as a child we played a game by the same name. Just recently we see a television program that airs with the title of  "The Following "


Scripture records time and time again ...The clarion of Jesus telling us to take up our cross and follow Him, He says "Follow Me" to the disciples, He says drop what you are doing and pick up my way of doing things.. When He said Follow Me.. I believe the M in Me stands for my and the E stands for example. How does one follow another, they learn their ways, actions, speech, characteristics, likes and dislikes. They observe the way that they resolve conflict, how they answer to accusation and how they respond when someones view concerning them has been distorted. They give though taken advantage of, become vulnerable in order to reach others, tear down walls to build others up, refuse to speak , though they have much to say and they give of themselves because they fully understand what was given as a ransom for them.


Jesus came to seek and save that which was lost, His kingdom was not of this world; yet the people including his disciples mistook his coming for the overthrowing of the Roman Empire. We too as Christians will often be misunderstood, our motives and intentions will be challenged and our reputation may even be slandered. But such is the life of the one who has chosen to lay down their lives for the sake of the Gospel. The crowds followed him because of the miracles, though great and mighty, He came to reconcile us and to change our hearts about How we perceive God the Father, ourselves , our brothers and sisters and the world.


 His popularity arose because they had never seen one do the miracles that He performed, had never heard such wisdom spoken , nor had they understood the power given to a person who has yielded themselves to the One who has sent them. If we want to be effective we have to look to the one who was most effective. A person does not go to Shaquille O Neal to learn how to successfully shoot free throws, but from his life we can learn how not to shoot them. If we are to follow the command of the Great Commission; surely we must go to the one who spoke to us commanding what is required.


 Many will say ... well that is not my ministry, but is that true ???, because in Matthew 28:18- 20 it states that ....He spoke to them, saying All authority  has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age, Amen. Although his is the end of the chapter it is the beginning of the command.... If we profess Christ, then our actions should display the fruit of the one that we profess to love, serve and appreciate.  To go means not to stay in the place where you are, to make is to construct by the putting of parts together and teach is to show , explain or educate someone how to do something.


Most want to go and build physical homes, while neglecting the ruins of their neighbors spiritual house, some want to dig a well in another country, but will not share a cold glass of water with those dying of thirst. Works ought to be accompanied by faith and I thank God for those he chooses to do those things, but what good is a nice home on earth, when a person is in danger of making hell their eternal home. And what is the profit of a well with fresh water if God has not entered the heart of the one who is being poisoned by Satan ?.


 The Great Commission speaks to everyone and the responsibility that each individual has to share the Word of Life with a dying world. The United States has become the untied states because we have turned away from the teachings and example of the God we profess to trust in. We can go to any city in the country and find... all nations... Vegas, Times Square and Rodeo Drive give us a birds eye view of every ethnicity that God has created.  My Jerusalem is those close to me, I must first serve them , before I endeavor to effective in Samaria or in the uttermost parts of the world.



What will it profit me if people knew my name, but not the One who created me for His good pleasure, redeemed me out of love and has empowered me to snatch someone else out of the fire ?. What will it profit me to tell another joke, when peoples lives have become a laughing matter, What does it profit me if I write a series of books, but am not a living epistle to be read before men ?


I must answer the call to take up my cross and follow Him, my cross is not a job, my weight or an infirmity.. my cross is the device God uses that very well may bring humiliation before honor. Will I follow ?... if I am forsaken by family and friends, will I follow if my motives and intentions are often misconstrued ?, will I follow and speak even if no one wants to hear ?, will I follow if alienation accompanies this journey ?. INDEED I SHALL FOLLOW !!!


For I would much rather follow the One who is high and lifted up

 Than fall low and forget that I was saved to serve ; not to be served.


Hidden In Him
Pretina J Lowery
March 15, 2013

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

A Wolf in the Woods

Most if not all of us are familiar with the old folk tale  " Little Red Riding Hood". Today I was reminded of this story and how the enemy desires to devour us. Our minds can be renewed by the Word of God, our  hope can be strengthened and restored by the power of the Holy Spirit and our soul can be kept safe by the blood of Jesus.

Many different adaptations of this tale have been revised over the years , but I will focus on the one that is most familiar to my memory.We read of a young girl walking in the woods alone... PAUSE ... I have an issue with that because as a child I was taught not to go anywhere unaccompanied and even in school they had  what we called the buddy  system. Why does one venture to walk through the woods ?, was it a shortcut?, were there no other open roads? or was she just that naive to think that she could take on the world aka the woods all by herself ?

 Okay back to the story...She is in route to her grandmothers house whom by assumption I will say she had frequented before to give her some food. Immediately you read of how the wolf who no doubt had seen her travel before, knew the way she would take and was just looking for the opportune time to approach her. I believe that he would hide himself in the midst of bushes, shrubs and or trees to camouflage his presence. In his heart and mind he had already decided her fate, the wolf wanted to eat her alive ... not scare, kidnap or torture her... but DEVOUR her entire being.


He then reveals himself and begins to have a conversation with her, I do not know about you... but as I recall the last time a female had a conversation with an animal in a woodsy area it spawned the inception of the fall of man. Eve was chopping it up with the serpent while he was too looking for a way to consume her. Why in the world did Little Red Riding Hood think that it was okay to converse with the enemy anyway ?. This is just my two cents but I do not believe this was the first conversation that took place , to divulge information of that magnitude with someone would cause me to believe that you were comfortable enough to express your comings and goings to the point of feeling some false sense of thinking that the other party was asking questions for your benefit instead of your demise.




Now the wolf begins to give her counsel if you will as to what she should take to her grandmothers house... really Satan , now you know what`s best for me ?. Her initial plan was to take food, now she is picking flowers for her very own funeral. She agrees and is in concert with his suggestion. Sleeping with the enemy only comes after we have had discussion, contemplation and were persuaded in some way , most likely by our own hidden desires. He cannot tempt you with something that your heart isn`t already longing for.


The wolf who is just as crafty as the Serpent, beats her to her destination, did he know the address because she told him or again did he just follow her pattern of doing things the same old way , but expecting different results ? . Either way,  he has found an open door and has now entered the house and grandma is nowhere to be found, could he have devoured her family member and would not stop until he overtook the young girl also ?. She arrives at the home only to notice that there is a little something suspect about her grandma. For the wolf has now disguised himself as FAMILY. Just as Satan disguises himself as the angel of light, only to be revealed as a counterfeit.Coming with the sole purpose to STEAL, KILL and DESTROY.Steal the peace you once found in wholeheartedly trusting in the power, protection and provision of God, to kill every dream, ambition and forward thinking mission that will bring life to others and to destroy your testimony, by convincing you that what he suggests would do you far better than what you already knew to be in your best interest.


Here we see her knowing in her gut that something, something, something, something ...just ain`t right !. But her next move tells much about the young girl. Instead of her realizing that things were not as they appeared , she stayed in the presence of the wolf and begin to converse with him yet again. The Bible says in Proverbs 6:27/28?.... Can a man scoop fire in his lap without his clothes being burned ?... or can a man walk on hot coals and not expect his feet to be scorched ?. What did she think was going to happen ??? .... the longer we entertain sin , we deceive ourselves into thinking that It does not have the power to overtake us.


She says " what a deep voice you have" , which leads me to believe that in the beginning he did not talk to her in the same tone, why else would she be startled ?.  His response was " better to greet you with", I do not know about you , but as soon as he said that... I would have exited stage left, ran faster than OJ in an airport and leaped over the bushes in the woods like Lolo Jones over those hurdles at the
Olympics. Dialogue continues... " what big eyes you have " and he replies "better to see you with "... again I would have played dumb and been like , my bad you must have me mistaken for someone else, I will just let myself out. She goes on to say " what big hands you have", now unless she worked on CSI or was a forensic specialist by trade, she should have noticed by now her examination of him , did not coincide with what she knew about her grandmother. He responds " better to hug you with ". Really you wanna embrace me now ???.  Ain`t nobody got time fo dat !.Some translations state that she then says "what big teeth you have and he faithfully replies... "better to eat you with ". His plot , plan and execution has now been made known, Now the very words that proceeded out of her mouth would cause her to be swallowed up by his mouth.

His plan was strategic from the beginning, he watched , he lurked, and learned her pattern . He coupled that information with seeing how much info concerning herself and those close to her would be released, presented himself as one who would make her journey that much more pleasant , beat her to her destination and all with the intent to use her own confession against her. The enemy is only aware of our next step when open our mouths... It`s like the container of mints , that  come with two openings, one side says... to share while the other says... not to share. May we too be conscious of giving our pearls to pigs.

 Though victorious in all things, we too today are susceptible to the wolf in the woods,  as well as the one in sheep`s clothing. If we are not careful we ourselves  can become the wolf preying on others vulnerability and  using the very information that they share against them. We can and have never been able to can handle sin, that is why the very thing that you thought you just could not live without  will wind up being the selfsame thing that is killing you. The craftiness of Satan can only be thwarted with the wisdom of God. Christ blood paid for and proved all for us.  The person who is fully persuaded that there times and seasons are in God`s hands, do not have to try and arm wrestle with the adversary, we have shown full well that it is because of our powerlessness , that God had to send his son to sacrifice his life to redeem ours.

May we not insult the One who willingly laid down his life for mankind , by leaning on our own understanding and walking on the edge of sins cliffs. Yes we all will be tempted, but when we are , may we not blame it on God because  He cannot be tempted by evil and He always provides a way of escape.

It is solely up to us if we will run with perseverance the race that is set before us or if we will listen the the "Wolf in the Woods"

Hidden In Him
Pretina J. Lowery
March,13, 2013






Monday, February 13, 2012

When your will is on the wheel

I am so excited today , there are times when I am beckoned to read the word of God and I become so consumed that I do not want to put it down. Today was one of those days. I began to examine myself and take inventory. Was I being a good steward of my time , talents and abilities or had I somehow convinced myself that I was owner of my life, how it panned out and what the finished product would be ?.

In order for me to evaluate my today , I had to first look at my past, what I loved doing, what made me the most happiest and how I would get myself out of a rut . I began to explore all of the occupations I desire growing up... whew that was a mini grocery list . I realized that I desired to be a teacher, lawyer, correction officer, pharmacist, dental technician, bartender , nurse, maid , waitress, run my own group home or half way house and the one who I knew for sure that would make me millions of dollars of course a rapper. And this was before I was 25 years old.

The underlying thread in all of these quests was the desire to help others who had fell on hard times ; due to poor decision making, lack of knowledge, disobedience or even because of another persons actions. a teacher because I loved learning , a lawyer well because I was pretty convincing and sadly must admit that I was an expert at arguing ,a dental tech so I could make gold teeth...lol.., a bartender to listen to other peoples problems and offer suggestions, a maid, waitress , group home assistant to serve and I`m from Brooklyn New York so that explains the rapper deal.

I soon found out that although these things had something in common it was because God put that desire there to serve people , not me. I loved rap because of the words and the stories they told not so much for the music. And sense I am being transparent there was a part of me that would love to have a crowd of people gathering just to hear the words that came out of my mouth. But God... He can take even the deceitful desires and purify them for His purpose. I believe that he is accomplishing in my life what he set forth before the foundations of the world.

One of the most often quoted scriptures next to John 3:16 has to be ( Luke 22:42) that states... saying Father, If it is your will, take this cup away from Me; nevertheless not My will , but Yours be done.
The word will  means to have a desire and to deliberately choose to follow a course of action... good, bad or indifferent.

Whitney Houston... I will always love you
Chris Tomlin ... I will Follow
Gloria Gaynor... I will survive

Songs that most know the words to but fewer actually live out.One chose to always love someone even if thins did not turn out as expected, another declared that the one they were following was trustworthy enough to lead them to dine destiny and the other proclaimed that I have made a choice to make it regardless of how my heart feels, what my circumstances dictate or how another person responds or rejects me.

I often think of people in scripture who were called outside of their comfort zones to speak to others whom they secretly decided that they were not good enough for God`s grace. Now I know our sanctified minds would say oh no everyone deserves the gift of forgiveness, but truth be told most of us do not evangelize, pray fervently or invest in others because we feel they have not arrived at a place to be accepted in. If we are truthful the only contribution we bring to the salvation plan of God is a load of sin and that constitutes everyone free access.

Yes I know that peoples eyes have been blinded by the enemy and so were mine, but somebody prayed for me and believed God even when my actions and speech were contrary. No everyone will not be saved and not due to God sending them to hell but because they chose to reject his sons sacrifice. In the end it is not my task to figure out what is in the heart of man for time and verbiage will reveal that. But my joy comes from knowing that God has selected me to be a part of his plan of reconciliation.

Jonah heard the instruction of God, not only ran from the people but tried to hide from God, now before we bring down the holy hammer on the prophet we too must look at ourselves, would we be readily willing to drop the familiarity of home, prosperity of our surroundings and set sail for a place where no one knows your name, you are not Mrs. popular, tell folks what God is saying without fear of rejection, ridicule or possible death ?

Either way he tried to go another route, I do not find it coincidental that there was a ship available to him to go on his merry own way... again we have been granted free will and he chose his own course. Great thing about God... His word stands even when we fall. With a bit of rerouting, God allows him to be thrown overboard , but not drowned... he was swallowed, but not eaten by a fish , came to his senses , cried out to God , repented and was catapulted right to the place where he was instructed at first.

Funny how we say we want to be used by God, but as soon as the script is not according to our design we want to bow out,  try and convince God that someone else would be a better candidate or fail miserably at trying to run and hide from He who sees all.

What if God is saying your season for you being frustrated with church folks is over and now I want you to minister to the lost, what if he is saying.. the boss you try and ignore is your Nineveh, Your landlord is your Nineveh, your estranged drug addict family member, next door neighbor with the grip of kids, the lady who does your mani/ pedi or your beautician.... whoever or wherever our Nineveh may cost us our place of comfort today , but our rejection of the assignment can cost someone their salvation for eternity sake

Father first off we thank you for calling us out of darkness into your marvelous light, we thank you for the prayers of the righteous for their obedience, the intercession of Christ as our Mediator and the groans of the Holy Spirit which we can not fathom. For without your divine will and the participation of others we too would be doomed to eternal separation from You. Teach us and instruct us on who or where our Nineveh lays, how we can move forward and please prepare the hearts of those you are sending us to .
 We fully understand that one act of obedience can save a nation of people. It is in your word..  and we have seen it in our own lives... now may we agree with you and tell the dying world of our Savior who lives.
Cast out all fear of rejection, for you are God enough to handle what we cannot. May we not be so concerned about how we will look or sound , but that we listen when you are speaking.
Thank you for the equipment, instruction manual and the same power that raised Jesus Christ from the dead that dwells within us. We thank you in advance for all who will come to love, know and follow you as Savior and Lord .


Hidden In Him
Pretina J. Lowery

Friday, February 10, 2012

The Diversity of a Disciple

As we go through life it is utterly impossible  to not make a comparison. Whether you grew up liking Prince or Michael Jackson, Uncle Ben`s or Carolina rice,  New York or Chicago style Pizza , Joy or Dawn dish washing liquid,  ketchup by Heinz  or Hunts, The Partridge Family or the Brady Bunch, the Giants or the Jets, The Yankees or the Mets... You compared just about everything to something or someone.

Today I was thinking about the twelve disciples of Jesus. Ordinary in physicality but extraordinary when yielded to the power of God. Upon reading the scripture we find that they too made comparisons among one another. You had here men from different walks of life, economic and educational backgrounds,and varied upbringings. Yet Christchose them because He knew what they were made of and how He would make even the most skilled fishermen... fish for and catch fish that were too susceptible to be eaten up by others.

Lord only knows the conversations they had , but the important thing was to realize that they were all called because of their individuality and not because they were cookie cutter followers. Some had tempers, others jockeyed for positions while yet one was a thief and betrayer, Truth be told we all could white out there names and put ours in their place. We all have been envious, prideful, quick to speak and slow to listen.

One of the things I love about this melting pot for ministry was that they heard the call, answered , dropped everything and followed Christ... did this mean that they were puppets and lost their identity ?, Certainly not... They believed in He who gave the invitation, but also learned through experience , object lessons, lack of faith and disobedience.

Everyone has a part to play in a band, on a team , in a play , at a place of employment as well as in the home. I think we stumble with comparing ourselves when we either do not know what our part is or if when  reject it thinking that someone else has gotten a better contract so to peak. Our gifts are given to us by the Holy Spirit as He wills, we can never boast because we are not the creator , but were gifted to use the tool given.

The Jackson Five would not have been the J5 if Mike would have been a solo artist from the start. The other brothers because of their humanity, personality and upbringing could have felt dislike toward their family member only them and God knows how it was to live in their household.

Joseph understood full well what is was like to be chosen for a specific task. We can become covetous, indifferent and even mean to people for things they themselves had no control over. I am sure if you could ask Joseph if he knew that he would have to go through all he encountered he may tell you and God... I`m Good God , I will pass on this assignment ... get back to me when you have a less stressful , but more glamorous task. Other people seem to get recognized more often, but there is always a price to pay for that attention. For many it would be a blessing but for some it was likened to a curse. It is all in the way we think while we are being pruned.

The expectations of ourselves and others can cause us to become prideful or pitiful. Perception is most important.. God chose each and everyone for His good pleasure, Who am I to say God I think you have me mixed up with someone else with my same name because I am not certain I can carry this out.

 And then He says I know full well who you are, who you are becoming and who you shall be, but you must understand that as long as you keep comparing yourself among yourselves , you will not be able to focus on the unique and awesome privilege of being chosen for such a time as this. I am speaking to you clearly and succinctly, instructing you on the types of people I have called you to minister to, have already provided everything spiritual blessing from above. And to top it off I have granted you assurance and the confidence of knowing that it is Me who works in you both to will and to do for my good pleasure.

Until the end of time the spirit of competition will live on. We must decide if we will allow it to taint our views or stifle our progress . The diversity of the Disciples shows us how God uses everyday people to do everlasting things. I pray that you always remember and never forget that although others may have your same name, come from the same geographical location , are in the same household,  are applying for the same promotion, attending the same church or even have the same birthday you were created to make a mark that no one else can.

 You as a snowflake are authentic , no one else has your fingerprints attached to their hands, nor God`s hand prints attached to your heart strings. Only Believe

Hidden In Him
Pretina J. Lowery

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

It`s a Sunshine Day... Or is it ?

Hello everyone first I would like to extend my gratitude to all who are following this blog. I know that it has been some time since my last posting .But in the words of my grandmother ... "speak when spoken to". God is speaking and I am sharing.  Today  I would like to discuss the topic of forgetting what is behind and moving toward what lies ahead.
Philippians 3:13-14 which states.


 Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead,  I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

Anyone who remotely knows me can attest to the fact that my middle name could well be Nostalgia instead of Jean. I take so many roads down memory lane, I may need to pay for those same roads to be repaved. The 80`s were my all time favorite... Pop rock candy, Saturday Morning cartoons, Soul Train, New York winters Big Wheels, Cabbage Patch dolls, jelly sandals, block parties,, Easy Bake Ovens, Army Men, Racing Track sets, water balloon fights via the roof.  Oh and we dare not forget some of the games we played almost on a daily basis like hot peas and butter , red rover, steal the old mans bacon, other may I and dodge ball  just to name a few.

The very word nostalgia means a return to or longing for something far away or in the past. As I read the scripture, perused through the dictionary and then examined myself I came to find that sometimes those trips can turn into vacations. Many including myself have been stifled by what may have been,...If I would have married so and so, taken that job out of town, stayed home that night, not drank so much or just listened to my elders things just may have turned out differently.

Although I moved to San Diego in 1990, my heart was still unsettled with longings of yester year in Brooklyn. Had I  grown ?... physically , mentally and spiritually yes . But concerning the emotional part ... not so much, I would say things like if bread was still 75 cents life would be good, If I did`nt have to pay rent , I could shop more. If I didn`t have to work , I could hang out with my friends who didn`t work, but always seemed to have money and new clothes.

I was stuck in a rut, plagued by fear ; not of failure because I had mastered that, but  of success , accountability and the hardest of them all.., the fear of growing up. Letting go and holding on is no more possible than being a Blood and a Crip, Vegan and Carnivore or Democrat and Republican. We must choose
 because one will ultimately suffer.

Of course I could have handled things differently, but we all know that God alone has to take over , and as we submit to Him and his purpose even our past can not stop us from walking in our right now. Had it not been for his mercy, for the prayers of righteous and the spirit of resiliency, I would have checked out sometime ago.

I grew up watching the Brady Bunch , so much that I had dreams of grandeur to one day star on the show as an adopted child... don`t judge me .. you wanted crazy stuff when you were a kid  :).
One of my favorite episodes was when they were on the talent shown singing Sunshine Day... The lyrics still ring in my head like it was the late 70`s all over again

I thin I`ll go for a walk outside now
The summer suns calling my name
I hear you now
I just can`t stay inside all day
I gotta get out get some of those rays
Everybody`s smiling
Sunshine Day
Everybody`s laughing
Everybody seems so happy today
It`s a Sunshine Day

NOT.. I wished it was that way,.. How could they be so chipper and I was so jacked up ? Well  that`s when I began to realize what was reality and what was entertainment, I know you may say duh... it`s television , but truth be told we many if not all of us at one time or another fantasized about a singer, athlete, politician or person of importance to come to our house for dinner. Holding onto fantasies, pipe dreams and most get rich quick schemes are like trying to tell a football team that they can only eat salad at Hometown Buffet... unrealistic and you may get trampled in the process.

My past was filled with lies concerning my worth, beauty and intelligence. Unsuspecting at one time but later just a willing participate due to lack of knowledge and the fear that someone would find out out that I was not as strong as I had allowed others to label me. I suffered with and through depression, eating disorders, sexual promiscuity, over indulging in shopping . I too became critical and judgmental, isolated and even self righteous at times.

It was revealed to me that the reason I love cartoons, coloring books , puzzles, reading books and board games as an adult was due to the fact that even as a child I was forced to grow up faster than my mind or emotions were capable of. I  love to learn and am very competitive .. just ask my husband or 15 other Words with Friends compadres. Everyone needs to look at the past and be grateful , but looking and focusing are two different things.

How could this be... a person who possessed a smile that could light a room was yet residing in darkness ?, the one who made others laugh at the drop of a dime , was crying because she was financially struggling.The woman who interceded and believed for the crackhead as well as the church goer... she was now doubting that she was "good or holy enough" for God to answer her very own requests? Please do not misunderstand even through this Jesus sent people to me to bless me with monetary gifts, rides to and from church, a listening ear and words of encouragement. I just could not dig myself out of this hole that I had created. I was so stuck on the former that I would self sabotage my present friendships, relationships and encounters because I was scared that if someone knew half of my past they would not except me for being the rock that I so often portrayed.

So I am instructed to submit to God, resist the Devil and pull myself up by the bootstraps and forge ahead. My body was suffering, my thought patterns were destructive and I suddenly realized that my heart had not been healed, not so much from what people did but because I condemned myself for allowing them. Some things were definitely not my fault, but others I contributed to just because it was comfortable. I sadly found comfort in not confronting issues, comfort in being mediocre ,so much so that yes was never heard because I was used to hearing no ,  comfort in just taking what others dished out even when I knew it was a lie . I faced life with trepidation , was super spiritual but not balanced in every day issues. I would pray and pray and pray but not move . or would move and pray that it all worked out somehow.

My hearts desire is to be all that God has designed and destined for me. I want to be the best mom to my children and understand that I too am still learning, I really want to be the best wife to my husband but grow and know my role as a spouse, I want to be a good friend and confidant regardless to how others respond to me.. But all these desires must stem from the notion of knowing that I am important whether I never have another child,  lost all of my possessions, was excommunicated from church folks, did not get married or ever preached in a pulpit .

So Today I am making a heartfelt decision to no longer allow the past to dictate my life. All of my memories were not bad I am wise enough now to know which events I need to recycle and which ones I need to trash in a receptacle.

I have been blessed so much , I often teases that I have to repent for being jealous of myself. I said that not to be boastful, but to show how you can have the heart, favor , provision and promises of God and still get stuck in your past.

Forgetting ; just like remembering is a choice.Though it may be rough at times it is not impossible. We can hold on to anger, pride or shame with a Kung Fu grip or Beat them down with truths from the Bible like Rock em Sock em robots... The choice is ours.

I would like to leave you with this thought...

 One can chose to walk across a bridge backwards
 But will inevitably enjoy the view and reach their destination
 By placing one foot in front of the other.


Hidden In Him
Pretina J. Lowery

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Don`t wake me I`m Dreaming

Anyone who goes to sleep will eventually dream, some say your dreams are what your subconcious has pondered on and it carries over into the sleep realm. Others say that your dreams have to do with the types of food you may have eaten before laying down. The Bible clearly shows us how God gave instruction, answered prayer and even showed what calamities and events were to take place.

The Dictionary describes Dreaming this way.. A succession of thoughts, images or emotions that pass through your mind while sleeping.

People day dream, envision or even fantasize about their lives as well as other peoples lives... how they are glad that they don`t live that way, or for many how they secretly wish they lived another person`s life. Without knowing what it took to live that way or what they have to do to maintain it on a regular basis. Dreams are designed to encourage us... some are from God, many are not this is why we must pray for interpretation and clarity . It is not enough to say I had a dream like Martin... but  what we do with that information will speak volumes to what we believe has been conveyed to us.

 As a child sleep to me was overrated, as a teenager it was utterly only necessary for babies and the elderly. But as an adult I quickly came to appreciate the gift of sleep. When I began to work the graveyard shift at a particular company I  was looking for sleep in the corner , in the newspaper and on the back of every milk carton I could find. I was somehow prohibited from sleeping more than 2 hours in the morning after being up for  9 hours prior to. It was a daunting task for me to say the least... I was a grown woman having to go to bed at 7pm at night like an 8 year old just so I would not fall asleep on the job. When everyone else was asleep I was wide awake and when I got off and desired to go to sleep everyone was preparing for their day. So even my dreams changed, I literally began to dream about sleep... how I missed it... what I would do when we reconciled and how I had grown to realize it`s importance to my growth, health and the fulfillment of those dreams. Everyone has witnessed a fussy baby who fights sleep, but oh the feeling of wanting to do something you were designed to do, but not knowing how to accomplish  it is a whole other ball of wax.

Many of us are familiar with the story of Rip Van Winkle, he was a kind hearted man who loved helping others, especially children but at the tragic expense of neglecting his very own affairs. He was one who was more concerned with tending to other peoples needs , so much so that he neglected his own affairs. To add insult to injury.. He had a nagging wife !... I wonder if she was some kin to Lot`s wife..? Anyway. In an attempt to escape her  "conversation"  he and the dog headed on a trip. Needless to say he met up with a man  and a beverage which seemed to like him a little more than he figured,  fell into a deep sleep and literally was knocked out for 20 years. The dog returned home without him, Rip had aged , grown a beard and even his gun was rusted due to the elements changing and the progression of time.

He was in unfamiliar territory and after understanding that he was not where he once was ,  He got all prodigal with it and knew enough to  head on back home. Upon that arrival many knew of Rip Van Winkle, but of the junior and not senior ; only the older generation was familiar with the elder Van Winkle. Sadly enough his son who had the same name wound up exhibiting the same character. Rip junior was not much of a go getter and did not accomplish much in life.

Growing up in New York we had a saying... Don`t sleep on me. It basically meant do not close your eyes or become unconcious to who I am and what I am capable of accomplishing. This applied to everything from athletic abilities to fighting skills. This reminds me that while I can blame the police, The man, President alcohol, my parents, baby daddy, or society as a whole... My dream becoming a reality has more to do with me realizing my own potential... preparing  for the manifestation of it and only believing. Than nodding off to the truth that the reason I am not further in life is because I took a nap and am just waking up from that slumber.

 We often sit and watch in amazement at others fulfilling their dreams. Many are envious, jealous and coveting.. not because they necessarily want the person to fail ,but because they may very well feel... Hey I could do that better than them.  Interestingly enough ... you will find yourself being upset at them for doing what they dreamt of  instead of realizing that the only difference between them and you is that they are doing it while you are sitting on your couch watching them do it.

 Personally this story was a wake up call...It let`s me know that I need not dumb down or diminish who I have been called and gifted to accomplish just to please others, I need to recognize that every time that I am afforded to open my eyes I can`t waste time and expect it to stand still for me. And lastly agree that right now is the perfect time to dream again.

 So if you have been given a vision or dream which I believe we all have , my next question is are you still in Dream land ???.   Dreaming of a white Christmas thanks to Irving Berlin and Bing Crosby.  Saying it was all a dream like Biggie when he gave us Juicy , desire a Dream lover to come rescue you like Mariah Carey... Or one of my favorites penned by my very own Pastor needing to ... Wake up Ur Dream.  I  would like to encourage you to no longer get frustrated because others may have slept on you ,  but Get up, was your faith, clothe yourself with truth , run with perseverance, arise out of your slumber and give em something to talk about !


Hidden In Him
Pretina J. McNeil

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Don`t be Scared ...

 Good Morning all . After a very restful night of sleep and being awakened by the breath of heaven, this is what was placed on my heart.

Most people if they are honest are scared of something : It could be : spiders, snakes, heights, dogs, their own shadow or even the dark to name a few. We live in a world where it seems that  phobias are as numerous as the very population they keep in bondage.

Being afraid is a natural emotion and we can attest to how a scene from a movie, a bump in the night or someone turning a corner too fast can startle us. But today I would like to go a little deeper as in maybe fear of the unknown. No human being has ever lived in the Kingdom before, so yes we are still learning how to yield, be developed and then carry out the procedures given to us by our Lord.

Far too many of us  know the church lingo, when to shout, wave your hand, clap, throw a washcloth at the preacher... as if that isn`t distracting enough, yell saaang... when the person is already singing, dance on que and put up that one finger to excuse ourselves which seems to draw more attention to you all the more.

We know how to pronounce words in Hebrew and Greek but many of us don`t even speak to each other in English. We have more resources available to us than any other generation, but my heart seems to think we are still way behind concerning some of the major things we have been authoritized to do.

We are anointed, transformed vessels of the Most High God. But we argue over everything from, choir robe colors, deacon uniforms, real wine and bread at communion , the rapture, the Trinity,or if someones salvation is hinging on whether they speak in an unknown tongue.

Stay with me now...In Isaiah 61:1-3 .. we get a glimpse of why Christ came. To preach good tidings, heal the brokenhearted, proclaim liberty to the captives, open prison doors, proclaim the acceptable year, comfort  and console those who mourn , give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy,  a garment of praise in place of the spirit of heaviness, call them trees of righteousness; the planting of the Lord, that HE may be glorified.

Now if most of  us took inventory , how many of these things are taking place in the sanctuaries of God.  ?Truly I attend a church where the Spirit of God moves freely, nor do I claim we are the only ones doing that which is right.. but my concern is after all of the shouting, hi fiving and crying are we anymore interested or obedient  to do what Christ commanded before we step into the building ?.. Or are we just  energized to trek through another week of work and play and come back on Sunday to do it all over again...  without seeing  any of the things Christ came to do ... be manifested in someone elses life.

Which brings me to why I started this blog.. have we as saints of the most high God forgotten that free people have been freed to free others ? Our liberty should spur others to want to be free and follow Him who paid the ransom for us all. I believe many of us are okay with the mundane, mediocre don`t rock the boat, let someone else get out and walk on water kind of religion that does not force you to use force, but we have the Living God wanting to kill some things in other peoples lives.We brag about favor for material things, but very seldom testify on how we have been delivered or  are being used to deliver someone us... which to me is much more favorable because I am not the only one who benefits.

Have we become so afraid of the demonic realm, or is it that we figure that`s not my calling and wait for the Pastor to do it. Please do not misunderstand me, I know we ought not go around just casting out demons within your own strength; because we cant !, But my Bible says I was given authority to trample on serpents, tread on scorpions, speak in other tongues, lay hands on the sick and they do recover, be disciples and change the world just to name a few.

How is it that in churches who claim Christ as their Savior, will tell you things like, don`t touch her hand I think she`s a witch, don`t stand too close to him, I think he has an unclean spirit, Don`t sit next to her she has  a jezebel spirit or watch who you let pray for you. I fully understand the presence of the forces of darkness, but  is not that what God wants.. people to be made well ? He has to use people who look like people to do His bidding, many of us would leave church permanently if an angel came and ministered to us instead of another human being .

Did not He say He gave us all things that pertain to life and godliness ?.  So the question is posed is everyone called to  deliverance ministry ?... So if you are not ; this blog is not for you. But if you are.. it`s all you boo.  Now if anyone knows me I am one of the most practical people alive. Sometimes I think we over analyze stuff because we really don`t want to do what Christ has instructed. (Just my opinion.. ) One of the saddest conversations I have ever had with the Holy Spirit went something like this... Why is it that there are so many people bound in Christ ? His response was because other christians and not Satan want to see them stay that way !. I do believe we see others struggling and we turn the other way, or IF we DO try and help .. to what extent ? do we do it like our own life depended on it?  Not really.
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Jesus touched a man who was full of  leprosy in Luke 5:12.. Anyone who knows just the elementary facts concerning leprosy , you know  it was not the chicken pox !!.  This disease seperated you from society, was dangerous to the touch and even defiled you religiously. So being a leper was not the business as some would say today. But Christ touched the mans hand  and he was immediatley healed!. How many of us WHEN we go to feed the homeless get all squirmish if we encounter a man who has urinated on himself, or with an stretched  out and not outstretched hand ; hand a woman some food. Are we ever going to get to a point where we are not so concerned about ourselves that we will run the risk of ministering to someone who needs deliverance ... over our need to be religious?

Father.. For You have given us everything ... which is Your Beloved Son , may we be about your business...  while making  other peoples business our business. Please forgive us for the times when we saw someone bound and did nothing to help. May we no longer look at them or talk about them to another , but may we  speak to that which has them captive ; that they would be released for your service in Jesus name.

In closing , I will say it again for those who KNOW God has called you to this work in the vineyard I pray you not waste another opportunity.. For Christ declared... He did not come for the well but for the sick....